Wednesday, January 21, 2009

Eros? Venus?

Actually, I would like to say that I really learned two new words today.
Eros = Love between Man and Women
Venus = Sexuality
Before I read this chapter, I never thought about this topic. In China, parents never taught this to their children. In our biology class, teachers skip the chapter which talked about sexuality. But, C.S. Lewis’s writing about Eros (pure love) and Venus (sexuality) is really interesting.
In his writing, he explained the sexual experience can occur without Eros. However, Eros includes sexual activities.
In old times, young couples got married by their parents’ will. Some of them never met each other until they went to their marriage bed. There was no love growing up between them. But because the fear of God, they obeyed his words, (“Be fruitful, and increase in number and fill the water in the seas, and let the birds increase on the earth.” Genesis 1:22), tried their best to “make” as many children as they could. Or, sometimes, we can explain that the Venus occurs depend on the human instinct instead of love (Eros). Most times, Eros only happened after several years of marriage.
In Lewis’s opinion, Venus should happen only after a couple falls in love. However, someone such as George Orwell, prefers the pure sexuality, or physical sexuality without Eros. If a guy wants only to have sex, he goes and picks any women on the street. Nonetheless, after the fruition, he simply abandons her. Why this happened all the time? As Lewis explained; because the sexuality happened without Eros.
“Now Eros makes a man really want, not a woman, but one particular woman.” Compare to old times, in the modern world, in most cases, sexuality happened after the “real” Eros. When a man fells in love with a woman, he is more concerned about the woman herself instead of her gender. But when the love (Eros) reaches a certain level, both of them began to have sexual desire. Having sex became a need-pleasure at this time. They are in love so deeply so that they want to be each other. As Charles Williams said, “Love you? I am you.”
There is distinction between Eros and Venus, when couples have Eros, they focus on each other; they express their love romantically. However, when couples have Venus, they focus on having the sexual pleasure in order to satisfy their own desire; they express love physically. Maybe, I want to say, in conclusion, Venus is more selfish than Eros.


  1. Dear Linda,

    How different the communication of parents and children can be in different cultures!

    Happy that Lewis was helpful!

    I do think you are right when you say that Venus is more egoistic than Eros!
    The other loves described in "The Four Loves", 'Storge', 'Philia' and finally 'Agape' love (not in your assigned readings but worth a discussion). It is interesting to see how these three are above Eros and Venus? In learning to love God, Family and friends, one can learn how to love a future husband (Eros and Venus)? I.e. Learning to be like Christ and loving your own family, and learning to have and cultivate friendships should come before those of Eros or Venus? I.e. Agape > Storge > Philia > Eros > Venus?

    God Bless,
    Adriana & Paulo

  2. i do not think that this Philia is a real kind of love at all and there is no kind of real love like (husband-family)love should come before the other and i think that the four loves is just a stubid religious christian book we should not take it seriously